The Best Deal I've Seen So Far...

This is a $72 dollar value and it's being sold for $19.99.

The bundle includes:
The bag - which I saw today in person and it's big and adorable
Nail Experts UV Gloss Guard Top Coat
Glazeware Lip Gloss
Advance Techniques Frizz Control Lotus Shield
ANEW Solar Advance Mini Sunscreen Face Lotion 

It is available here.  Just click the big picture and it'll take you right there.  

Don't miss this.  I've never seen a deal like this.

Favorite Post of the Week #5

Friends, this was a heck of a week.  We had a trip to the emergency vet for Morgan.  Once we came home we had to clean up the mess that she had made before we ushered her out to the vet.  Then Wednesday night we came home and there was a mess from Wilma.  Though it was not nearly as alarming as Morgan's issues.   Last night we were out to dinner with my aunt and work has been crazy.  

All that to say that when I sat down at 8 last night to read through blog posts there were over 180 unread.  Needless to say, I didn't. 

LUCKILY, I didn't have to scan too far before I got bailed out...  by Spot from What Passes for Sane on a Normal Day and this post

Anyone who reads Spot's blog knows that her daughter Lu has been pregnant for about five years.  I mean that's what it feels like, anyway.   I'm sure to Lu more than anyone else.   But baby Dylan is finally here.   And I'm so happy for them all.  For Luke and Lu, for Spot and Mike who are now grandparents (and I just have to say how happy I am that Mike was able to BE there... he had a horrid accident a while back and man, it was just bad) and Sean is now an uncle.  And he's hot.  I don't know how old he is, so I could be some gross old lady saying he's hot...  but he is.  Sorry Spot, but it's true.  You're his mom.  You know you have a good looking son.  

So thank you, Lu, for popping out that kid.  You made it easy for me during a tough week for my to find my favorite post of the week.

Happy Blogiversary to ME!!



That's right!!  I've been annoying you all with my blabbering and blathering for a full year!   I created Hamlet's Mistress a year ago today with this post.  And I DID have things to say.  Hopefully, I still do.  This blog is sometimes a challenge.  I'm not pregnant, I'm not raising kids, I'm not getting married, I'm not a world traveler.  I just live with my husband and our two dogs and three cats.  We go to our unexciting jobs and then home to do unexciting things.  Like last night that we spent the 2nd night in a row cleaning up dog diarrhea and washing dogs.  At least last night didn't contain a trip to the emergency vet.  Last night when it was Wilma instead of Morgan it was old hat...  "ok, Wilma, we've already seen Morgan do this... you're fine... turn around so we can wash your butt."  It's sometimes hard to glean from my life anything that anyone would want to read about.  And yet you do.  You continue to come here and read what I have to say and I love you all for it. 

I enjoy coming here immensely and writing.  I have these grandiose illusions that I'm a writer.  Don't worry...  you writers out there... I know that I'm not.  For one, I uses ellipses WAY too much.  But they're my bread and butter...  I can't not use them... excessively.  I love them. I'm not a niche blogger that reels in a certain interest group and captivates them.  I'm not a comedian or a wonderful spinner of tales.   I'm just me.  

And for one year now, y'all have told me, just by showing up, that me is enough.   And I appreciate it so very much.   Here's to another year ahead of boring stories and mundane ramblings.  I hope you all come along for the ride.  

Love you and thank you.

Amy - Hamlet's Mistress

Pamper yourself giveaway!

This giveaway theme is all about pampering yourself.

Lovely fragrant bubble bath for the mind...  delights for the feet...  and a beautiful fragrance for the body.


You get the whole set above, get to pick 3 nail colors (colors here) and get the scent above which is HEAVENLY.

That set contains:

Lavender Dreams Bubble Delight Bubble Bath
Soak away stress and relax in a fragrant blend of calming lavender and chamomile, prepping you for a blissful night's sleep. Dermatologically tested. 24 fl. oz. An $8 value.

Foot Works Lavender Overnight Treatment Cream
Simply massage into skin before bedtime and wake up to happily hydrated feet! 3.4 fl. oz. A $5 value.

2 Foot Works Lavender Clay Masks
Give your feet a facial with our top-rated customer favorite! Exfoliates with super-sloughing micro-beads. Cool and soften feet in just 4 steps:
1. Smooth clay mask onto legs and feet.
2. Let mask dry for 5 minutes.
3. Rinse off thoroughly.
4. Softer, smoother feet are revealed!
Each, 3.4 fl. oz. Each, a $5 value.

Foot Works Lavender Comfort Foot Soak
Soothes weary feet with the scent of calming lavender. 3.4 fl. oz. A $4 value.

All together it's almost a $50 bundle.

*Avon does not test on animals*

You can get entries by:

Register with me here.

Tweeting about the giveaway.

Facebooking about the giveaway.

That's a total of 3 entries you can get.  Also, leave a comment for each thing you do.  

Lastly, if you're already registered with me, leave a comment letting me know and I will automatically enter you.

You can enter until NOON EST on Monday, August 1st, 2011.  Winner will be picked shortly after noon.  


Also?  This isn't a radio station so there aren't any rules about only winning once every 30 days...

Be sure to check out my site, too!!  Look around while you're there!!

Favorite Post of the Week #4

This was a tough week to pick a favorite post.   there were so many I enjoyed.   In fact, for the first time I have runners up.  Several of them, actually

One, however, stood above the rest as making me laugh right out loud.

Amy Vansant over at Kid Free Living had me peeing my pants (almost) with this post about the hair washer at her salon.  I about died because I've had THAT hair washer.  The one that hates heads and has a personal vendetta against hair.  She was probably the little girl who got smacked with the wooden brush if she whimpered while her mother mercilessly yanked a brush through her unruly curls and she sees her job as payback.  She can't torture her mother but it's open season on the rest of us.

Other posts that made the finals...

Mummaboo x 2 with It Ain't Easy Being Almost 5

Off My Mama Rocker with Twinadoe Talk: Sigh

Brittany Gibbons is the Barefoot Foodie with The Dating Game

There we are folks...  I read a literal butt-ton of posts this week, these  affected me the most.

When you have nothing to say... list celebrities you've met...

Then maybe people will be dazzled and not notice you're a whack job...

I've met:

James Tolkan - aka Mr. Strickland from Back to the Future 1 and 2 and Marshall Strickland in BTTF 3 and The Commander in Top Gun.


Gil Gerard  aka Buck Rogers


Ernie Hudson!! - aka Winston from Ghostbusters, The Crow and a Ton of Other Stuff.  But mainly GHOSTBUSTERS!!


John Schneider - aka Bo Duke...  SWOON!!!  He's still just so hot.

Celebrities I haven't talked to but have breathed the same air as and have been within 20 feet of...

Patrick Stewart

Linda Hamilton

Lou Ferrigno

Adam West


Billy Dee Williams

Tom Hanks... we were at a museum in France together.  Well, not together...  but...  hey, whatever, it's technically right.  We were there together... at the same time...  together.

Now that you're totally distracted by how I had NOTHING to say...  this post is over.

Giveaway Winner!!!

I could not be more delighted to announce the winner of the watch giveaway.  

I used which produced the following:









Which corressponds to THIS:


So, Chib-ster.   Email me at with your full name and address.   I will be ordering your watch tonight when I put in my bi-weekly Avon order, I'll have it in my hot little hands on Thursday and I'll ship it out to you Saturday. 

***This watch and other fine products are for sale at My Avon Store!!!  With direct shipping right to your home!***

And keep your eyes pealed for more future giveaways!!  

Congrats, Chibi!!!  And thank you to everyone else.

The Last Cookie

So my husband has this issue...   I'd say that it's just a matter of being inconsiderate...  but I REALLY want to just believe that he forgets.  But he forgets ALL. THE. TIME.... EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.   There will be something that we've bought to eat.  A snack usually.  Doritos...  or Chips... or... as in the case of tonight and most times... cookies.

We will buy them.  I'll have one or two of said product.  When I go back several days later, there are two LEFT.  So, I'll bring it up.  And I'll hear the words, "The last two are yours."  Then, when I go to get them a day or so later...  they're gone.  He does it continuously.  He does it with drinks, too.   I'll go to get the last Diet Coke, that I've been told, "Is yours."...  I'll get the hankering for the Diet Coke and go to get it?   Gone.

If it happened once or twice, I don't think it would bother me, but it happens 100% of the time.  Without fail.   Like the other day I had a small bag of M&Ms...  the PEANUT ones.  The best kind.  And I hadn't eaten them all.  So we were in the car and since we were on our way to dinner I didn't finish them.  Then after dinner I said, "We JUST ate...  I'll eat my last few M&Ms later.  So we run an errand and when I come back in the car I decide a little sweetness is just what I need.  I go to finish my M&Ms.   Gone.

What IS that???  Who DOES that??  REPEATEDLY.  It's maddening.  And to me?  It shows a total lack of consideration and respect, even.   Am I crazy?  am I making a bigger deal out of it than it is?  I don't know.  But in the moment when it happens it makes me so very angry.

I love him very much.  But he's GOT to stop STEALING. MY. FOOD.   It gives me stabby pains behind my eyes.

Favorite Post of the Week #3

This week found me SERIOUSLY upping my blog reading list.  For this purpose alone, my Favorite Post of the week.   I can say with 100% certainty that I HATE blogs that are just the beginning few lines and then you have to leave the reader and go to the site to finish.  Maybe it's not super inconvenient on the computer, but I read the majority of the blogs on my phone...  and you know what?  Inconvenient.   So I don't.   So there are a few blogs that I'm SURE are good...  maybe even great.   But I don't have the time, patience and desire to "click through" to the real post.   So yeah.   A few blogs will probably never end up here just because of that. 

But now for the important stuff.   My favorite post of the week this week comes from MamaRobinJ of Farewell, Stranger.  She's @MamaRobinJ on Twitter and Farewell, Stranger on Facebook.  Her post from this week that I found to be the most captivating of all posts I've read...  which is A LOT... is this one, written yesterday.   I read a post on Monday from someone else and I had THAT post in mind all week and it became the post I measured all others against.  No one came close until I read this post last night.  It's a post of hope, of ownership, of taking back the reigns of one's life and putting yourself back in the driver's seat.   I wish MamaRobinJ well and am inspired by her.  I do not suffer with depression, anxiety, ocd, bipolar disorder or any of the like...  but I've got STUFF.  We've ALL got STUFF.  At one time or another we all let that STUFF dictate our course of action and let it control us instead of vice-versa.   Her post of reclaiming the decision-making task in her life makes me all the more confident to do the same.   I am more than the sum total of my Stuff.    So are you.  And so is MamaRobinJ. 

Thank you, MRJ, for a wonderful post.

A little of this, a little of that...

First and foremost, Justin Timberlake is a tool.  He went on national TV completely inebriated...  patronized Joe Buck and praised beer.  Like a ridiculous amount.  It was just stupid.  I've never been a huge JT fan, but now I can honestly say I just don't like him at all.   I would love to post a link to the video on YouTube but Major League Baseball has removed all the footage of it.   But here's a picture...  it's worth ALMOST a thousand words.



Can I just say how much I miss summer vacation?  It's one of those things I wish I appreciated more when I had it.  Seriously.  I would be thrilled for like the first two weeks and then the remaining 8 or whatever it was, I was bored out of my mind.  What a stupid child I was.  Stupid.  


My husband's boss is demanding we get our car washed.   Let me say it again...  my husband's BOSS is DEMANDING we get OUR car washed.  My husband is a shop manager at an Audi/Porsche shop.  Now, if the car sat there all day for customers to see, I MIGHT understand... however, we carpool and the car is at MY work all day,  Every day.  It's there for two minutes in the morning when I drop my husband off and it's there at the end of the day long after their last customer has left.   It's reached ridiculous levels.  He says something about it every day and now he's demanding it.  He's not even AT the shop yet and he called in to my husband to see if the car got washed last night.  I'm sorry...  but that's just asinine.  I'm so ready to text the guy and be like - IT'S OUR CAR.  At this point I want to not wash it just on principle. 


Lastly, it's July 13th...  my husband's sister's wedding is August 6th.  I think it's safe to say at this point we are OFFICIALLY not invited.  

That is all.


I don't normally comment on current events here.  I try to steer clear of it because the opinions are so diverse and usually passionate.   I definitely leave politics alone.  That's not to say I'm without my opinions...  because I've got 'em a plenty.  Boy, do I.  And they are vehement and whole-heartedly believed in.  Which is really the reason why I don't bring them up.  I just won't do it. 

But when it comes to sporting current events, I give myself a little more leeway to voice my opinion.   So here it is. 















Opinion 1.  That man is just all kinds of FINE.  F-I-N-E.  Fine.   So there's that.  

Opinion 2 has to do with the ball he hit last night for his 3000th career hit.  Now for you un-sports knowledgey people out there I'm going to throw some names out there that you can't help but recognize: 

Babe Ruth

Mickey Mantle

Lou Gehrig

Jackie Robinson

Reggie Jackson

Joe DiMaggio

Roger Maris

Unless you live under a rock you've heard of some, if not all, of these players.  All Yankees.  Now, don't get me wrong, I'm no Yankees fan, but Derek Jeter being a Yankee is in some pretty good company with these former players.   None of them.  NONE achieved 3000 hits.  And no, Derek Jeter's not on the juice, so don't go there with that.  It's just not true.  He's just hugely talented.

So his hit last night wasn't just a hit.  It was a homerun.  Caught by a 23-year-old in the stands named Christian Lopez who loves the Yankees and has loved Jeter for years.  Security was on him in a second and he was taken down to the office and was asked what he wanted for the ball.  The kid said, "I just want to give it to Jeter."  There are two firey arguments going on over this.  The one side is raking this kid over the coals.  Calling him every insulting name in the book for someone of low intellect.  The kid is in debt up to his jugular with student loans and that ball?  Easily worth a quarter mil.  But he believed last night and still today believes that Jeter is the right person to own that ball.  And he did get to give it to him.  People are FIRED UP that he didn't sell the ball.  Even offer it to Jeter...  but as a sale, not as a gift.   The other side of the debate?  Raking the people over the coals who are raking this kid over the coals.   They think it's a reflection of a better time, a more neighborly time... when people were more about each other and less about the almighty dollar and think what this kid did was honorable and the people freaking out over it are just showing the greed so ingrained in us now.  

Where do I fall in this debate?  Squarely in the middle.  Yes, what the kid did WAS honorable.  Absolutely.  There would have been nothing "wrong" with him keeping and selling the ball either.  Not one thing.  But to say that this kid is an idiot or stupid or an arse for giving the ball to Jeter?  Cut him some slack.  I don't think he should be vilified for doing a good thing.  A NICE THING.  Yes, he did a nice thing for a guy that could buy and sell all of us a million times over.   A guy getting paid something like 2o mil a year to PLAY A GAME.  But still, a nice thing is a nice thing regardless of circumstance or who the giver or receiver is.   In this case, actually, maybe it's even nicer.

I do personally hope Jeter does something for the kid.  Pays his student loans off or something.  The Yankees organization gave him box seat season tickets for the rest of the season.  Not even a whole seaseon, just half, but the kid is happy with it.  So good for him.  But I do hope Jeter tosses him something on the side. 

So for those out there just ravaging this kid...   leave him be.   And for those flipping out over those that are ravaging the kid... calm down.  There's no right or wrong in this situation.  It is what it is and the kid did what he thought was right.  And I don't know him, obviously, but I'm proud of him.

[caption id="" align="aligncenter" width="437" caption="Atta boy, kid. Well done. It's not everyday you meet your idol."][/caption]


BlogHer.... 13

Today I read this post by Casey over at Moosh In Indy.  First off, I love this blog and its author.  It's one of those blogs that I was planning to write about in the future, but as she wrote that post today, which has inspired THIS post...  I'll just talk about her now.

For years Casey and her husband had one beautiful daughter, Addie, and then found themselves face to face with what I can only guess was a painfully long bout of infertility.  Lo and behold, after probably all but giving up hope, they found themselves expecting.  A few months ago... 6 days before MY birthday (I was so hoping for a May 10th baby, but it seems like people just don't care what *I* want anymore... I mean, come on) little Miss Vivienne showed up to join the rest of us on this crazy spinning disco ball of life.  Casey writes with love, and passion and so much heart.  You can't help but be drawn in.  I've been reading Moosh In Indy for probably the last year and I'm sure I will enjoy her writing and her family for many more.

That being said.  She wrote the aforementioned post today and has made me want to go to BlogHer.   Let me tell you why.  That person she described...  that person who would feel left out the whole weekend, would spend it alone and come home sullen and feeling marginalized and bitter?  Yeah, that would have SO been me. I don't think so anymore. Her post opened my eyes to the fact that if I came home feeling that way, I'd have no one to blame but me... and I never thought of it that way. But she's right. She really gave me some perspective today.

The past two BlogHers I've sat by and read blogs leading up to it and thought, "Oh my GOSH, would you talk about something else... PLEASE?"  BlogHer 9 found me the author of Extraordinarily Ordinary, a blog I wrote but didn't feel passionate about.  I eventually shut it down and didn't blog for about 6 months.  I missed it terribly.

At the time of BlogHer 10, I was who I am now.  Hamlet's Mistress.  A new blog just 10 days old.  In fact my post during BlogHer 10 was What I Did While NOT at BlogHer 10.  It doesn't get much more bitter jealous than that, does it?

Next year, we're planning a pretty big trip to Orlando for the National Delorean Car Show, so I don't think I'll be able to see my way clear to afford BlogHer next year.  But BlogHer 13?  It's on.  I'm going.  I hope it's somewhere awesome.   Like...  Chicago.  No, I've been to Chicago.  Um, Seattle.  Yeah, maybe Seattle.  But I hate rain.

You know what?  I don't care.  I'm there.  Just not Philly, please.  I've lived 40 minutes from Philly my whole life.  I'd like to go somewhere new.

So, BlogHer 13 it's on.  Who's with me?

Name that movie!!

So it's been some time since we've done this and I think we're about due.   I give the line.  You give the movie.

1.   I CAN turn left.

2.  What did you DO, Ray?   -  Ghostbusters - Guessed by CathiC

3.   Listen, not a year goes by, not a year, that I don't hear about some escalator accident involving some bastard kid which could have easily been avoided had some parent - I don't care which one - but some parent conditioned him to fear and respect that escalator.  - Mallrats - Guessed by Megan

4.   No ticket.  (Could be two movies, but I'm aiming for the 1st movie it came from.)

5.  What do I want...When Mother Russia becomes one great nation again, when the capitalists are dragged from the Kremlin and shot in the street, when our enemies run and hide in fear at the mention of our name, and when America begs our forgiveness...on that great day of deliverance, you will know what I want.

6.  I doubt they'll throw up any roadblocks, not for an old crook like me.  - Shawshank Redemption - Megan

7.  I know I am going to miss the heels because they do something for my posture.   And I'm suddenly very aware and proud of my breasts.

8.   If I'm King, where's my power? Can I form a government? Can I levy a tax, declare a war? No! And yet I am the seat of all authority. Why? Because the nation believes that when I speak, I speak for them. But I can't speak.  - The King's Speech - Megan

9.  Unicorns, I love them. Unicorns, I love them. Uni uni unicorns, I love them. Uni unicorns, I could pet one if they were really real. And they are! So I bought one so I could pet it. Now it loves me, now I love it. La lala la la...

10.   Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should.  -  Jurrasic Park - Megan

There they are.   Name 'em

Do You Have the Time For a Giveaway

It's giveaway time.   And this time?  It's all about time...   with this beautiful watch.

You can enter 4 ways.

1.  Comment on this post with your favorite blogs.  There are two comments now, so I'll start with comment 3.

2.  Tweet about this giveaway.  "@hamletsmistress"  in your tweet so I see it.

3.  Facebook about the giveaway.  Friend me so I can see your wall.  

4.  Go here and register.      If you're already registered with me, just leave a comment here letting me know.

Come back to this post and leave me a comment about what all you did and I'll put in your number of enteries.


Entries must be in by noon EST 6/18/2011

Give me your favorite blogs!!

Now that I've started this favorite posts of the week thing and the numbers show it's a hit, I need to branch out. 

So it's group participation time.  And I know y'all are out there.  I see you.  Give me your favorites, and your own, if you're not sure if I read it yet.  

Thank you in advance for the plethora of responses I'm going to get.

Favorite Post of the Week #2

Or should I say posts...  it's a tie this week.  Yes, it is.  It's my blog and my idea.  THEREFORE, IT'S ALLOWED.

The first is just so sweet I couldn't pass it up.  And oh how I love watching this little girl grow in pictures.  I mean not in THIS post.  She's the same size in all these pictures.  But since she's been born it's just been awesome.  I love this blog.

Funtivities for the Fourth

The second post made me laugh right out loud.  Not a cute chuckle or a little giggle either.  A full blown "HAAA!" That made the dogs jump, scared my Romeo cat right off my lap while inflicting a couple scratches to his momma's knee and made Tom actually say, "What's so funny?"  Normally he ignores my outbursts and just assumes I'm reading more of those pesky blogs by people I don't know.  But when I read this one to him, it got an, albeit small, guffaw out of him, too.

Frat House Tales:  Who's Type A?

So there they are folks...  this week's Amy's favorite post(s) of the week!

The Stay-cation that was an inspiration...

I have just wound up a mini vacation...  in addition to having Monday off, Tom and I also took off yesterday and today.  And as it is now 5:17pm...  my mini vacation is over.  We didn't go anywhere, didn't do anything in particular.  In essence we did nothing.  *I* did nothing...  and to quote one of my favorite movies, "It was everything that I thought it could be."

I mean, yes, I did the normal stuff that needs doing.  Laundry, etc.  But my God...  there was TIME to do it.   and I've noticed a few things.

I am not:

- Tired

- Stressed

- Unhappy

- Angry

- Miserable

I AM however:

- relaxed

- rested

- content

AND because of this time I've had to pay attention to stuff I never have time to pay attention to:

- my house is clean

- I lost 4 pounds this week.

Yeah.  Um.   The working thing?  Outside of the home?  Gone for 13 hours a day every day?  It's not working.  For me.  And I need to figure out what to do about it.  Because there's still a mortgage to pay and bills that arrive each month...  unforgiving, un-understanding bills that have to be paid over and over.  So money is necessary.

So I'm thinking about what I could do.   And then...  a novel idea just popped into my head out of nowhere... for a novel.  One that I think could actually be good and that I might actually WRITE.  And more importantly... FINISH.  Cuz God knows, I've started like 6 different books.  But this one??  It just seems to fit.  So I'm going to start it.   Tonight.

Of course this inspiration struck on the last day of NOT being at work which means I go back to the horrible daily grind tomorrow...  but I'm going to do what I can.

I'm excited and who knows...  maybe it'll be good.  Maybe?  It'll even be published.  And then MAYBE?  A few million people may buy it and THEN???  I won't have to work outside the home.  Because honestly?   I'm not cut out for it.

Not in the least.

We're still here in 2011... it didn't work

We took the car out for the first time on Saturday to a local car show.  It was great to be able to get it out there.  Tom's worked so hard on it and spent so many hours out in that garage.  It's not completely done.  He's adding lights and stuff, which he showed me today which is making it just look AWESOME in dimmer light.  It's so cool.   I'm so proud of him.  He's just done a phenomenal job.

Favorite Post of the Week #1

So as I've said before, I read a lot of blogs.  I was reading one of them yesterday>  Yeah I think yesterday and I came across a gem.  And I thought, "Hey, this is my favorite post of the week!"  Hence, this was born.   *gestures up to post title and throws glitter and rainbows at it while twirling around and saying "Ta-Daa!!")

So since I was reading this particular post when being inspried by this idea...  I felt it necessary, nay, dare I say obligated, to make that post my FIRST favorite post of the week.

So here it is from the illustrious, albeit, terribly inappropriate Adam Avitable!!

Thank You for Emailing Me to Tell Me I Suck

Happy Friday, everyone!!